What I Just Hate!!!

I'm generally a very likeable sorta guy. You can ask anyone and they will disagree (yeah...that's right...I said disagree). No really I am. I don't get angry easy. As a matter of fact, my X always accused me of letting people run all over me. I figure it's just because she was the polar opposite. She didn't take nuttin from nobody! Now, my new friend Eric, if he's reading this, may disagree with me about me letting people run all over me. We had an incident once at youth camp (yeah...I know...one time...at youth camp...go ahead...I know you want to do it!) that was funny now that I look back on it. But, in my defense, I was sleepy! Im too old to go to youth camp obviously!

But even though I love everyone and get along with just about everyone. Even though I try to see the best in everyone and can put up with just about anything. Even though I see beauty in everything, there is still some things that I just hate! One of those came up in an email tonight and got me to thinking so I thought I'd share that one thing with you but in all fairness to you my readers, I thought I'd make a longer list. After all, what fun would it be for me if I didnt ramble a bit? Thats right. No fun at all! Of course, that's my plan. It does not mean that it is exactly what Im gonna do. Im just gonna start typing and let's see where this messed up mind of mine takes us. Shall we? So now I take you inside the mind of a 38 (sigh...still hurts to type those two numbers side by side) year old man with ADHD. Hang on. The ride may get a little bumpy.

Since joining this site I enjoy the opportunity to meet new people. But I can't stand that initial "contact" you make with them. Can you? I find someone with an interesting profile, someone I'd like to talk to, and I hit the "send message" button. Now, you have to understand, I'm not one of those guys who will type an introductory letter and then copy and paste to a ton of people every night. I mean, that just wouldn't be fair would it? That would almost be like cheating from the very beginning of a rel...WHOA!!! HOLD ON! I nearly said the "R" word! WHEW! Im glad I caught myself! Not looking for a relationship right now! Can't believe I almost said that! Glad I caught myself in the nick of time!

But I still think that I owe it to whomever I contact to write a thoughtful, kind, and personal letter to each and every one of them!

This presents itself with a number of problems! The panic when I hit that "send message" button and that plain white piece of paper appears on my computer monitor starts my heart on a rapid race that is bound to lead me to the edge of passing out.

I hate white paper! It just bothers me! I cant stand to see a pristine unblemished piece of paper with nothing on it! It rubs my very being; it goes against who I am. The mind of a maniac wants to fill that page with all sorts of letters, numbers, dotsexclamation points, and well, honestly, a bunch of nonsense.

I stare at that paper until the maniac inside me begins to boil and starts screaming out from deep within my being, "I can't stand the white page! I HATE WHITE!!!! ANYTHING BUT WHITE PAPER!!! PUT SOMETHING ON THERE!!!!"

My heart beats faster and faster. But what do I say?

Aaawww...there's the rub. What to say indeed.

So, I pretty much do what I do when I write one of my blog articles. I turn my brain off (which is not that difficult to do as you can imagine) and just start typing whatever nonsense pops into my head.

Anything but the white because white's bad. White needs some rambling placed somewhere, everywhere up on it.

I've always been like that as I'm sure some of you have. Have you ever walked by a freshly poured concrete pad. You can hear it can't you? Calling your name. YES! That's what would make that perfectly smooth and level concrete look better, my name scratched forever somewhere in that concrete. Even after the pain of the spanking has years subsided, your name still lives in that concrete slab.


But the pressure, oh the pressure of every time I hit that "send message" button is getting to be too much for me.

Now you know why...If you came to my blog after reading an e-mail from me, now you know why that first e-mail was so, well, weird, different, insane...yes...insane.

But rest assured. You received an e-mail like no one else has received. I wrote it especially for you, as crazy as it was!

No autographs please.